Another season of The Bachelorette is over and looking back, it was definitely one of my favorites. I didn’t think so at first, but Emily had a fabulous group of guys to choose from. At least 6 were dateable in real life. Let’s take a look back at the 3 hour evening, shall we…
The live finale didn’t seem too different to me, except the subtle audience giggles that more so confused me. But honestly, I would’ve given my future first unborn child to have been in that audience. Just being honest.
The episode starts off with Emily talking about how she thought she’d know who her guy was, but she fell for two men. Not that uncommon when you date 25 men at once. To make her decision easier, Emily’s parents and brother fly down to Curaçao to help her. A nice, interesting family. Emily and her mom definitely share hair dye and plastic surgeons, and her brother, well I’m having a tough time taking Ernie seriously.
Jef Meets The Family
The first meet and greet is with Jef. Emily’s parents probably thought he was showing up to play with Little Ricki, but then realized they were mistaken. Jef showed up in his cleanest, fanciest, Hanes white v-neck and Jef ensures the family that he’s completely in love with Emily and ready to have ridiculous dance parties with Little Ricki. Then he chats with Ernie, who I think was more interested in scoping out Jefs hair than anything coming out of his mouth.
In true gentleman fashion, Jeff asks Emily’s dad for her hand in marriage, and after thinking about it for 12 seconds, her dad gives it up.
Arie Meets The Family
Next up, Arie gets to meet the Fockers. I assumed he’d be cool, calm and collective, but instead, gets really awkward and resorts to talking about the weather and fishing. He also gave a quick recap of his journey with Emily. I wonder if he left out all of the times he threw her up against a wall and went to town.
Arie didn’t show up empty handed. He gave Emily a box, filled with each rose shed given him. I had higher hopes for what was on that box…
Arie quickly wins over Ernie, who was probably envisioning all the cool racing events that Arie could take him to. And then in true Mr. Maynard fashion, her dad gives up Emily’s hand in marriage within seconds.
After the guys leave, Emily’s family gives her no help in making a decision. Her dad doesn’t think you can love more than one person. He obviously hasn’t seen this show before.
Emily and Jef spend their last date together on the beach, talking about Little Ricki and whether or not Jef should meet her. This really confused me and maybe because I’m not a parent. But why not introduce them? Can’t Mommy have guy friends? I understand not making the kid meet 25 men, but she’s only 6… You could lie to her! Luckily, Emily agreed with me eventually and decided to let Jef meet the rugrat.
To no ones surprise, Jef hits it off with Little Ricki, probably because she’s similar to the kids in his play group. Sadly, we didn’t get to see Little Ricki jump off the bridge, because she needed an adult next to her and unfortunately, Jef does not qualify.
After freeing a hermit crab and bonding on the front steps, this trio calls it a day and I’m marking down a win in the books for Jef.
Later that night, Emily and Jef chat about their journey and he gives her a book that he picked up in the hotel lobby. And just when you thought it wasn’t a personal gift, Jef reveals at he drew stick figures throughout it. Boom!
The Morning After
The next morning, Emily is bugging out and tried to call Brad Womack’s therapist but he was booked, so she resorted to Chris Harrison. She reveals that’s she knows Jef is the one for her but she can’t even be happy because she feels so bad breaking up with Arie. And she needs to tell Arie that as much as she loves him, she loves someone else a little bit more.
To really soften the blow, ABC chooses to send Arie to an herb garden and make him pick out herbs for a love potion. How cruel can this production team be? Why not just send him to Neil Lane and have Emily show up there? Geez. Emily arrives to tell Arie that he picked the wrong herbs and his potion did not work. Before she reveals her big news, Arie rubs the oil all over Emily’s arms, which couldn’t have been good for bug bites.
Emily starts crying and tells Arie that she always thought it was going to be them and something changed. Arie’s reaction was so real, one of the most honest exits I can remember seeing on the show. He was mad, but who wouldn’t be? In his words, he’s f*cking confused, feels stupid and naïve.
Back in the live finale audience, Chris Harrison catches up with many of my favorite contestants to get their input – Ashley Hebert and JP, Deanna Stagliano, Mike Stagliano and Ashley Spivey. Cute little segment, but most importantly, how fabulous did Spivey look? We’re going to need to chat about how to make my body look like that when she gets back from LA.
Emily wakes up and knows she made the best decision sending Arie home and choosing Jef. She and Little Ricki write in their journals while Jef meets Neil Lane and picks out quite the stunner. As Emily gets ready, she keeps saying she’s not sure if she’s ready to be engaged but I don’t think it’s possible to turn down Jef on one knee with that ring.
Emily gets ready and gets down to the crime scene. ABC had budget cuts this year so instead of a romantic ocean view setting, they’re going to get engaged in front of some Curaçao shacks. And rather than a helicopter or speedboat, Jef had to walk to the final rose ceremony.
When Jef arrives, she tells him he is her soulmate. Then they each say some really mushy things and I might just be PMS-ing, but I got real choked up. Jef tells her that what he’s going to ask her is a forever thing, and with that, gets down and proposes. After leaving Jef on his knee for ten seconds, Emily says yes. Little Ricki shows up (in wedges) and the new happy family skips off into the sunset together.
After the Final Rose
The much anticipated, most dramatic After the Final Rose was a pretty non-dramatic let down. Nothing against Emily and Jef, they’re adorable, but there was nothing exciting or shocking.
Emily tells us how happy she is and that although her ring is beautiful, she’d be happy with a ring of tape around her finger. I’m gonna call bullshit, but if that’s true, send me the ring Emily… I’ll wear it for you.
Arie shows up and looks INSANELY hot. Stage makeup definitely works well on him and those eyes…. Oh my. He talked about Emily breaking up with him and seemed blind sighted.
We hear that Arie flew to Charlotte, dropped off his journal and left. But Emily didn’t even read it. I’m not sure how anyone has that much self control because I would’ve read it cover to cover.
Jef and Emily are doing great and have spent every weekend together. They each talk about how much they love each other and how perfect they each are. We get to watch the proposal again and luckily for me, I didn’t get emotional, so I know I haven’t fully lost my mind.
Future plans: Jef is moving to Charlotte, but going to live separately from Emily and Little Ricki. I can’t imagine that’s going to be fun or easy to coordinate… Just move in together. And apparently, we can expect a springtime Charleston wedding, after they go save lives in Africa. What a storybook ending!
So there you have it. Did everyone love the finale? Do we think Jef and Emily will last? Is anyone else praying that Arie is the next Bachelor? Leave some comments and make sure to come back tomorrow for my Bachelor Pad 3 recap!